“Encourage inspiration by making yourself a fertile ground for an idea. This usually means living life well, make sure your sensibilities are stimulated by new experiences.” – Rikky Rooksby

After a brief introspection at the mall, I think I found the reason why I never excelled or become famous. Its because I am both a perfectionist and a generalist (who is also insecure).

Going back to my growing years in elementary, high school and college, my normal behavior would be to go out of the classroom during class hours and go to the library. Its because I was interested in general knowledge in many field of study, current events, history, etc. The teachings in the classroom bored me.

I am also happy at visiting new places and trying new things and is fickle in many ways. Although inherently loyal and even clannish, it is my perfectionist, discriminating self that has prevented me from manifesting this nature.

So my life has been a terrible cycle of mediocrity. My generalist self trying everything and my perfectionist self discarding everything, knowing I wont stick around and try another thing tomorrow.

I think it was just the lucky breaks that helped me reach the level I am at now. Passing the Philippine CPA exam was one, and I only did it because I imagined each subject as a competitive gymnastic routine (Auditing = Balance Beam). Getting highly irritated if I don’t get a perfect 10 in the self-exams has propelled me from being a listless C accounting student to a board-passer in a matter of a few months. How weird is that.

I think it is high time I should just stick to a thing or two that I should master and consequently be substantive and relevant. I have already laid the foundation of an accounting career that would help me get through life and finance the projects that I would like to get involved.

I have the next three or so months to find out which areas I would be good at. I would be scheduling my time to discover writing/literature, music and painting, product development, technology, entrepreneurship, and other creative work. Then I will just focus on the thing/s I could excel in.